Matrimonial
Today I'm in Erica's wedding, and I'm looking forward to it. Also, I'm looking forward to it being done. I'm really bad at weddings.
See, I've never been very interested in weddings. In college my friends would all sit around the TV to watch that show on TLC, "A Wedding Story." I never did. I never planned my wedding as a child, never paged through bridal magazines, never dreamed of the day my beloved would gently lift up my veil. I mean, when I was a kid I dreamed of being a chemist and used the kindergarten's dollhouse to play "World News Tonight." That's not the same.
So I've never really paid much attention to weddings, or to the frills and extras that accompany them. That makes me nervous. What if I make a smartass comment that takes away from the solemnity and overall girliness of the day? What if I trip and put a big rip in my dress? What if I step on a groomsman's shoes during the dance and wound him?
I can't wait for my wedding. If I screw that up it won't disappoint anyone*. For Erica's wedding, though, for the big day she's been looking forward to for so long, I want everything to be absolutely perfect. Including me.
* Well, it's Mike's wedding too, so he might be disappointed. Although I think he'd laugh at any of the above scenarios.
posted by Danulai @ 6:02 AM
4 Comments:
shit happens at weddings (i typed weedings, i can't think why) that is sometimes less than nice. ways to minimize the problems are:
1. if the best man is a joker, threaten him with death if he tries to play one at the wedding
2. on the day, after the dress is on, walk no where without someone to hold onto.
3. talk to your intended beforehand about not mashing the cake in your face, it's rude and it lacks respect.
4. don't get drunk, there's plenty of time after the day of the wedding to get smashed.
5. if you have kids in your wedding party, be prepared to be upstaged and/or have something to screw up. kids are cute, and unpredictable.
6. and if something does happen, laugh. really, laugh. it might win you $10,000 some day.
I've noticed that bridal gowns are not garments so much as architectural structures. Erica couldn't even go to the bathroom on her own. I'm hoping that my years wandering around a living history museum in bustles and hoop skirts will stand me in good stead at my wedding.
I would indeed laugh, and you don't have to worry about me smooshing cake in your face. At least not on your wedding day. Cake is for eating.
I can't WAIT to hear all about it. I hope you'll post pics too. As a musician -- I have PLENTY of fab wedding stories!!
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