Easter Sunday

Yesterday Mike and I spent Easter Sunday driving all over southeastern Wisconsin trying to visit everyone. First we went to church, then it was off immediately to my parents' house. We spent a few hours there with my parents, my sister, and her (yikes) fiance. After that we went right to Mike's parents' place and stayed there for dinner.

When we arrived Mike and his dad immediately parked their vans in the driveway, tailgates facing, and started the long process of moving his parents' stuff from the old van into the new one, and transferring the stuff from his car and a few items from the garage into the old van. I sat inside the house with his mom, listening to her opinions on their new kitchen, their ham, ham in general, the new van, the old van, Mike's old car, vehicles in general, my brother-in-law, and other stuff. Mostly it was a monologue, and whenever I tried to contribute she talked over me. People in his family talk over each other quite a bit and not out of malice, but I still haven't figured out how Mike can capture his parents' attention and get multiple sentences in without interruption. It's a conversational trick I'm still learning.

I'm really trying to get along with his mom better. I like his brother and his dad a lot, but have a tougher time with his mom. During the course of our visit I figured out why...she and I have some traits in common, and the others are completely opposite. The biggest trait we share, and the one that causes the most friction, is the fact that we each believe that it's our job to take care of our little family. Unfortunately, our families overlap where Mike is concerned. Instead of just tag-teaming on the nurturing, we sort of grapple for control. I suppose my determination to take a job during the summer, and perhaps a second job during the school year to make extra money for us is no different than Mike's mom's desire to ply us with random groceries or money during every visit.

Mike's mom and I are settling into a pattern. She gives money to Mike while I'm out of the room. I do some baking and send it back with Mike's dad, who never turns down my cookies. She takes us out to eat. I bring some food to their house as a surprise, and put it in her fridge before she can protest. There's a lot of love in our family, and in the coming months and years we'll figure out whose love is winning.