Today was a School Improvement Day, where we send the kids home halfway through the day and spend the afternoon trying to figure out why our school is so bad. It's not fun.
Today I was in no mood for school improvement. Mike was gone last night and I always have trouble sleeping when he's gone. I firmly believe that he keeps away the murderers, and so even though I didn't watch a minute of Law & Order I was still pretty freaked out. I slept part of the night with the lights on, part of the night with the lights off but my glasses on so I could see, and part of the night awake and looking around. It wasn't restful.
So this afternoon after our big school-wide meeting in the auditorium we broke off into our department meetings. I tagged along with Special Ed. Our department chair asked us to get together with the teachers next to us and list a few ways that we draw support from our administration, colleagues, and community so we can identify our strengths and maximize them.
It's almost like an exercise to see how many buzzwords he can fit into one request.
So I turned to the teacher next to me. "After a difficult day I like to consult with someone in a related profession," I said seriously. "Personally, I've drawn a lot of support and inspiration from an individual in the military. Perhaps you've heard of him. Captain Morgan?" The teacher burst out laughing and I kept on very soberly. "I consult with the good Captain frequently. Sometimes if he's not available I refer myself to Dr. McGillicudy. I think he's a psych."
"You said that with such a straight face," the teacher said, still trying to stifle her giggles.
"If I wasn't dieting, it'd be the truth too," I grumbled.
"And don't forget other administrators," our department chair called as he circulated the room, listening in on the conversations. "Like the school board."
"I don't consult with the school board," I whispered to the teacher next to me. "I like to get advice from people whose rap sheets are actually shorter than my students'." Our school board has a few felons sitting on it.
"Shh, I think there are some board members here," she said, pointing to a cluster of people we didn't know.
"Oh, how can you tell?" I asked. "Did you spot a home-arrest ankle bracelet?"
In a place like this, you either develop a dark sense of humor or crack up. And since we need my paycheck to pay rent, humor it is.
