It's a weekend, all right

It’s been a good weekend.

On Friday afternoon I called my doctor and made an appointment for the 27^th. It’s not as soon as I’d like, but it’ll do.

After that I drove home and packed up my suitcase to go to Madison with Mike. His band, the Scarring Party, was playing a show, and we decided that afterwards we’d be too tired to drive back to Milwaukee so we were going to grab a hotel. I had made arrangements to see Marc as well since he lives in Madison, but unfortunately he got the dates mixed up and we never met up. The show was exuberantly played but poorly mixed. Despite that I’ve had their cover of Leonard Cohen’s “Everybody Knows” stuck in my head all day.

After some post-show excitement – Mike lost, and later found, his wallet – we took off. We decided against staying overnight because Mike’s inhaler had run out of medicine and his other, full, inhaler was sitting on our headboard in Milwaukee. We got home around 1:15 and I could barely keep my eyes open, which made me feel incredibly lame. Not so many years ago I could stay out at the bars until 2 AM, and then still muster up the energy to stumble across town to my little apartment. Although, in all fairness, by that point I had been up for over 20 hours, so I guess I deserved to be tired.

Today we slept in and then went to the Holiday Folk Fair. It’s pretty much a big exhibition with booths that show off crafts and foods from all different ethnic groups all over the world. The best part was eating my way through the food booths. I had some interesting orange cheesecake (German), split an egg roll with Mike (Hmong), had a bite of a cookie called a “little coffin” (Czech), and ate a favorite dish that I can only get at events like these…authentic Thai volcano chicken. Mike ate a bit of it, even requesting a second taste, and said it wasn’t bad. I may just drag that picky eater into a Thai restaurant yet.

We also looked at the craft booths. They’re always interesting because if you look hard enough you can get some pretty awesome stuff for relatively cheap. I got an interesting wooden cross-shaped pendant with silver accenting. I’ve been meaning to wear more jewelry (read: any jewelry at all) and so I’m trying to find basic pieces that can go with lots of stuff. The choker that came with the pendant, though, was just a thick piece of silver wire that was open in the back so you can pop it onto your neck. I didn’t notice that when I bought it…I talked with Mike about soldering on some jewelry findings to make it close in the back. I also got a blue-glass evil eye charm from a Turkish booth. It’s meant to ward off misfortune. When Mike’s cousin got married to a Turkish girl last spring they gave out tiny evil eyes as wedding favors and I put mine in my office. The place did seem more tranquil. In the process of packing and unpacking my office stuff, though, I lost it. This was a more substantial replacement.

Right now I’m mustering the energy to beat Mike at Scrabble. I hope the rest of the weekend is just as good.

A doctor who treats himself...

For awhile now I've been having problems with my voice. I couldn't talk as loudly as I could before, and I didn't have as much of a range when I sang in church. Lately though, my voice has gotten gravelly towards the end of the day, and I developed a more disconcerting symptom. I can feel it whenever I swallow. A bump.

Now, bumps of all shapes and sizes in your vocal tract, from nodules to polyps. And they aren't always harmful, so I was having fun dragging out my voice disorders book and trying to put a name to my particular protrusion. But I think my bump is growing, because when I walked briskly to the grocery store tonight I had incredible pain in my throat, and even as I walked slowly home I whistled on every exhale. I was talking on my phone as I walked, and towards the end I could barely catch my breath.

Both my mom and my consulting speech pathologist (a girl named Jen who I graduated with) agree...it's time to call the doctor.

However, I do have two reservations:

1. The last time I went to the doctor they wound up running a bunch of tests that aren't covered by my insurance and it cost me $400

2. All those tests pointed to - ta da! - nothing. The dizzy spells I'd complained of were the product of simple dehydration. And that was just this past January. I don't want to go back again in the same year for something that's really nothing. I kind of think that if you come in too many times for problems that turn out to be nothing they just write HYPOCHONDRIAC in big red letters on your chart. I don't want that.

So, we'll see. Although if they do perform an endoscopy where they stick a camera down my throat, I hope they give me a copy of the video. I want to post it to YouTube.

Alphabet Meme

Yay, a stolen meme!

<>A is for age: 26
B is for beer of choice: I prefer beer-related beverages, such as Smirnoff
C is for career: Speech pathologist, baby
D is for favorite Drink: Slurpees or screwdrivers
E is for essential item you use everyday: lipstick or lip gloss
F is for favorite song at the moment: Baba O'Reilly
G is for favorite games: Katamari Damacy, Sudoku, or Scrabble
H is for hometown: Boondocks, Wisconsin
I is for instruments you play: I used to play the alto sax, and I can play “When The Saints Come Marching In” on the harmonica
J is for favorite juice: Pink grapefruit
K is for kids: The five cats are enough
L is for last kiss: Mike when he came through the door
M is for marriage: Did that
N is for names of your best friends: Jack, Captain, and Doc McGillicudy
O is for overnight hospital stays: I don’t think I’ve ever stayed overnight in the hospital
P is for phobias: Spiders, murderers
Q is for quote: “Intense love does not measure, it just gives.” – Mother Theresa
R is for biggest regret: Not being more daring in college
S is for self confidence: Some would be nice
T is for time you wake up: 5:30…it’s killer
U is for underwear: I’m in favor of it
V is for vegetable you love: Potato! I love, love, love potatoes
W is for worst habit: Worrying
X is for x-rays you've had: Just my teeth
Y is for yummy food you make: Scones
Z is for zodiac sign: Sagittarius

Dreams

The dream I wrote about in my last entry was definitely a vivid one, but like I said, I don't think I'm worried about divorcing. I do sometimes dream about the things that I worry about, but I also dream about random things that I saw on TV, heard about, or read.

I think this time my dream was inspired by two things:

1. I was sleeping alone that night...Mike wasn't with me because he was in Minnesota
2. I'd recently had a conversation about losing him

Here's how the conversation started...Mike's grandmother died about a week before our wedding and his parents are still helping to sort out the estate. Recently they were getting pretty agitated because, in the process of sorting out Grandma's affairs, they were told that normally in wills things are left only to the children instead of friends, spouses, or anyone else. I guess that in their will the estate was left to the surviving parent, and if both parents died it was left to Mike and his brother, Greg. They were getting pretty worried that their will was somehow invalid since the parents were included.

Now, personally, I don't think it's a problem. People leave things to organizations, friends, even pets all the time. And Mike's parents used a lawyer to draw up their will, so it's gotta be pretty legit. But they were getting all worried and felt that they'd have to meet with the lawyer again to change things.

There was one other thing they wanted to change in the will - me. They felt that now that Mike and I were married they should somehow provide for me, but they weren't sure how.

"You don't have to do that," I told them.

"Well, do you really think it's fair that everything gets split between Mike and Greg?" his dad asked me.

"Well...yeah," I said. "I mean, I can share with Mike."

"Well, what if, God forbid, something happens to Mike. Then Greg would get everything. Is that really fair?" he asked me.

"Sure," I said carlessly. I had never really thought about cashing in when our parents die, so I wasn't too concerned about the money I might not be getting.

"Well, what would you do?" he asked me.

"Oh," I said cheerfully, "I guess I'd just wait around for my parents to die."

That was not an answer that was appreciated.

Anyway, I guess all the talk about mortality and wills and providing for Mike's untimely demise got to me.

Maybe tonight before bed I'll do a thorough perusal of Cute Overload to make sure that any dreams are cute and kitten-inspired instead of scary and lonely.